Do You Know Me?
by SoulsandSwords
Summary: On a lazy evening, Tugger invites Munkustrap to play a fun, rousing game of 'how well do you know me.' What starts as silly banter becomes much more sentimental... (ONE-SHOT / COLLAB)


**Note: The cover was made by the fabulous Karas Hu ( bazneko on instagram)! She's a fantastic artist and I recommend you follow her! I thank her for taking my request for doodling a Munkustrap / Tugger brotherly love moment. This little one-shot is more or less the recordings of an RP session my buddy and I did and I thought made a nice fic. NOT part of ****_The Tail of the Jellicle Cats_** **or** ** _The Silver Age_** **at all, but is instead a stand-alone piece. Pretty funny, but ended up getting rather heartfelt. Might do more of these... Anywho, shout-out to my RP bud (Dynamite-truck on tumblr), for playing Munkustrap while I myself was Rum Tum Tugger!**

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Munkustrap's day had been relatively nice so far. Though it was still just around lunch, so it wasn't even near over. His morning had been just like the usual, check up on the kittens, make sure they're alright, eat, catch up with some of the older cats, ask Alonzo if anything unusual has happened during the night, life as usual. Everything had been completely normal. Well. That was until _Tugger_ had decided to make his appearance. That tom was unpredictable, and Munkustrap didn't like it one bit. He was relieved to see that the Maine Coon was only really hanging with the kits for now, but as soon as Tugger spotted him, and started making his way up to the Jellicle protector, Munkustrap turned his head away and contemplated running away from his brother. There was no way in the heaviside layer that he had any energy to put up with the Rum Tum Tugger yet, but it didn't really seem like the tabby had a choice in it, since said cat had already arrived.

"Hey, brooo! My main mann! Wassup?"

Munkustrap let out a breath that he didn't even know he was holding and turned his head to look Tugger up and down. "Nothing, Tugger. Not until you got here at least. Do you need something?"

Tugger frowned. "What do you mean _do I need something_?" He said in a mocking voice. "I can't say hey to my big brother?"

"Of course you can!" Munkustrap shrugged and turned to look out across the yard, simply watching over everybody. "I was just asking a question, Tugger, no need to be so dramatic."

Tugger propped up the collar of his jacket. "Anyway, the kittens, before they started swooning, I mean, were playing some kind of game that I thought might be fun for us." He remarked with his trademark grin.

"A game?" A crease appeared between Munkustrap's eyebrows as he furrowed them, a little confused as to why Tugger wanted to play a _game_. Like they were kittens again. Wasn't he too busy being... Well, Tugger? "What is it about?"

"It's kind of interesting. It's just you ask one person a question about themself and they have to try and answer. You know. How well do you know me?"

"Oh." Munkustrap shifted to get into a more comfortable position. "Alright then. Sounds good to me." It did sound slightly fun, and it's not like he'd be pulled away from his duties by doing it. So, why not?

"I _thought_ it could be amusing." He rubbed his paws together rather mischievously. "So, why doesn't the big bro go first?"

"Fine." Drawing in a deep breath, Munkustrap redirected his gaze up to the sky as he tried to think of a question. "I'll start simple, then. What is the worst trouble that I got into as a kitten?... If I even did at all?"

"Pssh. _You_ in trouble?"

"Mm. I know. Come on, answer it, then?" He turned his head. "Have I, or have I not?"

"What kitten _doesn't_ get into trouble? Hum... was I born yet?"

"Oh, I can't say. No hints, Tug."

"Oh, come on!" Tugger sighed. "All right, all right... I'm gonna say it was... Oh!" A revelation struck him. "You'd always go out and muddy your coat from playing in the rain!"

"Ah, right. Good job." He let out a hum of which resembled a small laugh. "Now it's your turn. Give me something good."

"Jeez, _that's_ the worst you've done as a kitten?" He said, ignoring the invitation to ask his own enquiry.

" _Yes,_ Tugger. Surprisingly enough, not everybody avoided rules like the plague when they were a kit."

The Maine Coon rolled his emerald-green eyes and blew a tuft of fur out of his eyes. "All right... let's see... what was my first favorite human album?"

"Oh, Everlasting. You liked, and still do, all kinds of human music!" He breathed in sharply and picked at his claws. "Uh... I don't even recall the names. Wasn't there that one band called Queen? That one was so strange, they didn't even have any queens singing! And that Bowie person... Humans have such strange names."

"Mmm." Tugger clicked his lips. " _Close._ Those are my favorites, but I had _one_ album that when I picked it up, I was mesmerized."

"Oh, I—" Munkustrap grumbled something under his breath. _"Space Oddity? Aladdin Sane? The Game? Sign o' the Times?"_

"Jeez. You don't remember?"

"I suppose not then. I give in."

Tugger, with a disappointed sigh, said, " _Unknown Pleasures_! Joy Division! Bro, how do you not remember them?"

"I don't know! I'm sorry then for not remembering everything about you— Jeez."

"You liked 'em too! Remember that one song, _Dead Souls_?"

"Yes! I do. Everlasting, you're acting as if I've forgotten your birth date. It was ages ago, Tugger."

"Okay, okay." He sniggered. "Your turn, bro!"

"Obviously. Hm... Do you know who was the subject to my very, very first crush?" Munkustrap cocked his head to the side.

"Oh psh!" He folded his arms. "That's easy. It was..." He drew a flatline. "Uh... wait, crush in the tribe, or like, celebrity?"

"In general. Come on, it can't be that hard! Just guess."

"Is it your girl?" He smirked. "Demeter?"

"Nope."

"What? Bro, you've loved her forever!"

"That's true. But she wasn't my first."

"Christ... How early we talking? Kitten? Teenagers? What?"

"Uhm... Pretty sure it was more around kitten. Halfway between, maybe."

"Hm..." Tugger scratched his chin. "I'm gonna say... Bomba?" He knew _everybody_ crushed on her at some point.

"Not really, no."

"Okay." _T_ _hank god_ he was thinking. "Exotica?"

Munkustrap let out an incredulous laugh. "Of course not."

"Jesus. We have _a lot_ of attractive queens here, I can't single out just one!"

"Hey, you _were_ close, Tugger. Just think a little harder. If you're capable of that."

Tugger hissed at his retort and wondered for a moment. It was boggling. He didn't know what Munkustrap's 'type' was besides Demeter... if he even _had_ one. They'd been rather distant their adolescent years that he knew almost _nothing_ about his romantic life! "You got me bro. Give up."

"It was... Cassandra." Munkustrap gave another huff of a laugh at Tugger's confusion. "You tried though, that's what matters." He pat his brother's shoulder.

"... _Cassandra_?"

"Exactly. Don't judge me."

"Oh, no! I'm not, bro. Trust me..." There were some things he wondered how Munkustrap would react if he knew about him and her... for now, he'd rather not bring that up. "Sooo my turn?"

"Yup. Be nice to me this time, _please_."

"Okay, okay. This might make you laugh. What was I _most_ insecure about growing up?"

"Oh, god... Didn't you once get those strange pimple things on your face? They didn't last very long but you made quite a big deal about it." He snorted. "I can't recall any other time you've been... _Vulnerable."_

"Psh. I never got enough acne to fret about. Come on! You got this!" He playfully punched his shoulder.

"Oh, please. Don't act like you handled that well." He sighed and once again begun picking at his claws. "I don't know..."

Tugger rolled his eyes. "You don't remember my old nickname all the kittens gave me?" He raised his brows.

"Seriously? You were insecure about _that?_ Oh, Tugger..."

"They weren't wrong." He snorted. "Toothy Tugger."

"Of course not." He held back a laugh and redirected his gaze to the ground below. "Anyway, I'll just ask you the same question, what was _I_ most insecure about growing up?"

"What _weren't_ you?" He lovingly sniped. "I dunno. I used to hear you always say that you were too tall. Then I hit my growth spurt."

" _Meh._ I guess. There were worse things, though." He shrugged.

"Worse?"

"Mmmhm."

Instead of amusement, Tugger furrowed a brow with slight concern. "Like what?"

"I dunno. You're the one that's supposed to tell me."

"Well I dunno, bro! I don't think—" Tugger stopped himself short.

"What is it?"

"Nothing. I give up. What's the answer?"

"No, why'd you cut yourself off?"

"It's nothing. But really, what's the answer?"

"Come off it, Tugger. Tell me. It's never _nothing."_

Tugger sighed. This crap was _not_ his forte. "I was just gonna say I never..." He took another sharp hiss of breath. "I never thought you had any problems growing up."

"Seriously?" He raised both brows at his brother. "You think _I_ didn't have any problems? Why in the world would you believe that?"

"Not like _your life was perfect_ or anything!" He scowled. "More like... more like you never had anything to worry about because everyone liked you." Good grief, that left a weird taste in his mouth.

"I wish. No, Tugger, it was never like that. I worried. A lot at that. I worried constantly, still do. If anything, it'd be you that doesn't have any worries.. But I've got a feeling that that isn't the case either."

Tugger smirked. "You think I don't have things I worry about, brother?"

"Thought. I don't anymore. Nobody lives in a worriless world after all."

"Tsh. You're right about _that._ " Instead of going into his own question, he kept quiet.

"I know I am..." Biting his lip, the grey tabby glanced back out across the yard yet again, deciding to focus his attention on some of the kittens playing in a pile instead.

Tugger didn't say anything else... a profound thought was crossing his mind. He too seemed to just watch the kittens as well. The thought of running once again crossed his mind and Munkustrap calmly placed his hands in his lap, his ears turning to listen if anybody else was around.

"It's my turn now, ain't it?" Tugger said abruptly. "What IS the one thing I worry about?"

"How am I supposed to know that...? I mean... We rarely talk about this stuff. I can't remember the last time we actually had like... A serious chat." The corners of Munkustrap's mouth twitched down. "I haven't got a clue."

Tugger shook his head. "Yeah you do." He shot him a cocky grin, veiling his own discomfort.

"Seriously, Tugger, I don't." The tabby turned his head to look up at his brother and frowned.

Tugger pursed his lips and thought about responding... but he decided against it. "You know what? This game was a dumb idea anyway." He pulled on his vest and stood up. "We'll say I won and leave it at that."

"What?" Confused at the almost whiplash causing change of mood, Munk got up to his feet as well. "That's it? You're not going to tell me?"

"You said you didn't know. Game over, bro."

"Yes. I don't know. So you have to tell me the answer."

"It's not even all that interesting."

" _Sure_ it isn't. Come on, tell me!"

Tugger hated what he'd thrown himself into. _Must_ he say it? Was it _really_ not obvious enough? "Well... I'll give you a hint... I grew up with it."

"You... You grew up with it? Tug, you grew up with _a lot_ of things, can't you just tell me? Please?" The more than familiar feeling of worry slowly but surely made itself known in his chest.

Tugger fidgeted with his belt, resting his thumbs under the strap. "Remember how I used to crawl into bed with you when we were kittens because I'd get scared? There. That's your hint."

"Tugger!" Munkustrap sighed in slight irritation, tensing up a little. "Stop being so vague! Tell me what's wrong, for the everlasting's sake, I want to help you."

"I didn't say I needed your help! It's a question for a stupid game I started."

"This isn't a game anymore. I'm worried for you, seriously. You're just acting so... _Off_ about all of this. I know there's something wrong. And you have to tell me. I'm not gonna stop pestering until you do!"

"You just answered it." Tugger glowered. "I'm worried for you." He spit out.

Munkustrap stopped, the expression on his face falling. "What?" He hesitated before continuing. _"You're_ worried..." The tabby pointed at himself. "...for _me?"_

Tugger cringed. "Don't rub it in, bro! Jesus! Way to turn the tables. I was hoping to embarass _you!_ " He said, trying to downplay the situation.

"Why would I be embarrassed by my own brother caring about me? I'm more confused than anything. Why are you so worried in the first place?"

Tugger, with his eyes averted, responded. "I just keep thinking about that first time you had an anxiety attack. Remember? You were twelve, I was eight? I swore to god you were going to choke to death if I didn't start yelling for our father... And every day all I see you do is patrol the borders, take care of everyone, fret about whether they're happy or not!" He was spilling it out fluidly, but it was increasingly difficult with every word. "I just..." He trailed off. "I don't know." He finished.

Once again, Munkustrap tensed up, though for a different reason now. Memories of what had happened instantly flooded back as Tugger mentioned that dreadful day. He could almost feel that same panic and fear right then and there. Though, he quickly redirected his gaze back up to the Rum Tum Tuggers face and all that slowly faded away. "I..." Munkustrap breathed in sharply. "I understand why you worry. But, I'm telling you now, that, I'm fine! I can take care of myself, you know? You— There's no _need_ for you to worry. Though, somehow, I'm glad you do. I'm... I'm glad you care about me, Tug. Really."

"I _know_ you can take care of yourself... but you're too busy taking care of everyone else to show me that. The other night when you were going on that spiel about how 'father wants this' or 'I need to do that' all I can think about is you're gonna have another meltdown and what if I'm not there to do something."

"I'm not going to break down just because I'm thinking about something other than me, Tugger! I'm not a kitten. I can handle things on my own and I don't need somebody holding my hand through everything just because there's a small chance something might happen. I'm just doing my job, you know. I'm doing what I want. I know the risks of it, and I'm not afraid to take them. You need to calm down. _Please._ "

"I'm _calm_." He growled. "Anyways, anyways." He rubbed his temple, suddenly getting a headache. "I suppose since you got the answer, it's your turn now."

"No you're not, Tugger. Don't lie." He paused and then cleared his throat. "And, please, I don't think I can concentrate after this, it's just—" He turned away. "—A lot."

Tugger had nothing to say. He let out a puff of air. What more did he want? A hug and for him to say that he 'loved him?' Munkustrap _knew_ he loved him. But what good was pressing this on any longer? He waited for him to say something.

Of course, with Munkustraps luck, all cats had seemed to vanish, either retreating into their dens or running off to some other part of the yard. So all that he could look at was... The large piles of trash and scrap metal that surrounded them, which wasn't too entertaining. It took him a few awkward, silent moments before he finally spoke again, just letting out a simple, "I'm sorry. I didn't wish for it to end like... like this." He gestured limply with his paw. Sure, sorry wasn't the best thing to say, maybe a little cheesy if not, but the grey cat didn't know what else to say.

"It's _your_ turn, bro." Tugger said quietly. The game wasn't over until they _both_ agreed so.

"No. It isn't. I'm not asking another question." He murmured, still not being able to bring himself to look at his brother.

Tugger sighed. "Then I guess the game's over." And at that, he slunk off the pile of rubble. "Good night." He swaggered off before Munkustrap could say another word to him.


End file.
